Overcome Self-Pity by Learning How to Leave the Pity Party – Therapeutic Methods & Depression Hacks


are you somebody who finds yourself
falling into self-pity over and over again and you don’t know how to get out
of it stay tuned because in this depression
hacks I’m going to teach you my method for getting through self-pity
to get you out of that depressive funk what’s up everybody this is Chris from
the rewired soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution so me
as some of you know I’m a recovering drug addict and alcoholic so not only
did I like to party my favorite party that I used to go to was a good old
fashioned pity party I used to love just sitting in my room by myself or curling
up on my bed in that fetal position isolating stuck in my thoughts thinking
about how this person’s life is better than mine why is my life not better why
am i single why don’t I have the job I want why don’t I make the money I want
all these things I would just sit there and fuel my own depression by sitting in
this pity party and if you’re watching this and you’ve ever struggled with
depression you know exactly what I’m talking about this is something I talk
with my clients about all the time because I work with a lot of people who
struggle with depression and first I start talking about the root causes of
self-pity now something I will do more videos on
is how to rewire your brain to be in more control of your life in your
situations because once you start realizing how much control you do
actually have over your situations then you start to see how much more you can
actually do because a lot of self-pity is based on expectations expectations
that the brain makes up like my life should be better I should have a better
job I shouldn’t be single I should it be home alone right now I should have more
friends all these shoulds in our brain and I will make a video talking about
how we start expanding the areas of control that we do have and we start
taking back this control which makes it less likely to fall
into that self-pity so this depression has the reason you’re here with me today
is to talk about my self-pity method so there is a very good reason why I start
every video about how we talk about the problem but focus on the solution as I
mentioned in other videos I’m sick and tired of people out there just talking
about the problem and never giving the solution for it so when I started
actively working on my mental health and actively rewiring my brain to change my
habits my behaviors my thoughts my emotions as well as overcome a lot of
symptoms of mental illness I had to learn how to stick in the solution so I
have over a hundred videos on here many of them are providing you with solutions
so my self pity method is that I would time it I would time it like I want
everybody who’s watching this to be perfectly clear on one thing
it’s okay to feel it’s okay to feel bad it’s okay to feel sad it’s okay to feel
angry it’s okay to feel upset it’s okay to cry all of these things are okay
they’re normal human emotions and they’re there for a reason that’s what
makes life life you know like once you get through this and start working on
some more of these things you’ll start to learn how to love these emotions
because they actually make you realize that you’re alive but what I had to do
was I had to start timeing my self-pity now in the beginning when I was doing
this it was a long stretch I would do this for hours and hours on end but
eventually I narrowed it down to about three hours so for three hours
do your thing go lay down lay in bed isolate eat a tub of ice cream watch
movies think about how the whole world’s against you and sucks all this stuff at
the end of that time that’s when you flip the switch and you say now it’s
time to get in the solution okay this is what I started doing I would give myself
a block of three hours okay so if it was nine o’clock in the morning or give
myself into noon and then I was like okay now what’s the solution
and there was plenty of solutions whether it was
meditating whether it was going to hang out with friends whether it was
journaling anything that I know is going to help get me out of that funk because
if we don’t set a time limit on it that starts to expend and take up our whole
day it starts to occupy the space in our brain the entire day about how we just
feel terrible about ourselves and I always try to teach this to my clients
who struggle with any type of mental illness when you isolate you’re locked
in the same room as the enemy all right so we have to go and be proactive and do
things I always tell you this I have never not once in my entire life worked
with somebody or met anybody who has solved any problem by sitting around
isolating in self-pity and stuck in their own thoughts I had not met anybody
who has made that a solution so you need to recognize that and then go out and
start pursuing that solution whatever it may be
browse around my channel I have a ton of videos depression hacks videos other
videos about rebuilding relationships how to work through anxiety stuff about
addiction all sorts of things so make sure you’re checking out my other
playlists because I’m here to provide you with a lot of solutions so if you’re
somebody who constantly find yourself stuck in self-pity start giving yourself
a time limit give yourself a time limit for a week and every week start
decreasing it by about thirty minutes oh yeah
so started three hours decrease into two and a half hours two hours and
eventually you’ll start seeing that you’re retraining your brain to actively
pursue that solution a lot sooner than you ever have before all right so I hope
this helped you out if you have any questions make sure you leave them in
the comments below as well as suggestions for other videos if you’re
struggling with anything regarding anxiety depression any of that stuff
make sure you leave a comment if you’re new here make sure that right below this
box you hit the little brown subscribe button because I’m always making videos
to help you overcome your symptoms of mental health and also like I mentioned
before if you check to the left side of this screen you’ll see
there are extra videos that you can check out too so thanks again for
watching this is Chris from the rewired soul I’ll see you next time